Nesstown Zoo Saga Book 8 by Ewston Snooz (Evelyn Murray and the two NGs.)
A new trilogy; The Lord of the Things, Book 8- The Fellowship of the Winds.
the continuing saga of Nesstown Zoo
episode 74 - Search For Alphonse


loosely based on the Jack Dagger novels by Evelyn Murray and adapted for radio internet
©copyright Evelyn Murray (and from 2009 the two NGs as well) 1997, 1998, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018(probably), all rights reserved.
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Nesstown Zoo saga pages ©copyright Infinity Junction dotCom 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018(probably)
(Nesstown Zoo notes and background click here)

the story so far...

Shot Ukulele in Nesstown Jungle   Fake WMMD planted in Nesstown Zoo's enormous Dung Jungle by the CIA were found to be real. This has led to a whole load of has-been politicos and troops sent in to sort the place out to get completely lost there. Having failed several times now to escape Stalag Nesstown and set up a snowy new Proletarian Penguin Peoples Party Republic, or even get central cooling installed in their pen, the dreaded 4P have moved beyond their normal capriciousness and are becoming positively fractious. A "monarchist" emperor penguin has now been "re-conditioned" by the brothers and has tried to breach their enclosure fence. Megalomaniac Monantos Corporation are set for a Nesstown comeback after a previous failure to take it over, despite the zoo's finances being in the red. Now they are planning a wind farm there to gain generous green subsidies and have dropped phones into the jungle in an attempt to contact those lost inside.

now read on...


   Hypnotic music, hypnotic voice, Dung Jungle miasma. Lost Nanette from the Nukulele band was now under the control of Monantos... until the phone battery ran out anyway. "Find the elephant, find him, calm him with music. Walk him down hill. Tell me when you find him."
   "I must find the elephant, I will calm him with music. I will tell you when I have him in my control."
   "Good you are doing the right thing, keep doing it."
   "I will keep doing it."
   "Find the elephant now, calm him, phone me."
   Nanette clutched her ukulele with the arrow hole through* it, started walking, and walking, and walking. Charlotte the accident prone monkey tried to tell her she was going in the wrong direction but Nanette didn't understand.
   In the technical offices of Chateau D'Ough, Monantos staff anticipated their first trial tower tow up to the top of the Dung Jungle. If all went well, soon they'd possess the only wind farm on an SSSI and World Heritage Site. Organic electricity should be a big profit maker.
* (See book 6 and graphic above.)

*****

   "School holidays next week, I suppose we'd better find the elephant and bring him back on show." Zoo Owner stated with little confidence of success.
   "Leave the monkey in there, Charlotte and Alphonse don't mix well."
   "She has the injuries to prove it. Is there any... you know what Alphonse likes."
   "There should be some growing in the forest, I'll send Jungleman Jones to pick a barrel, better bring it out after the public's gone. Don't want them recognising it."

*****

   Plain Pete the ex emperor penguin picked himself up from where he stopped rolling and felt himself for broken bits and bruises. Then he remembered what he'd been trying to do. Painfully he waddled over to the fence. No hole. Pedro came over to see if Pete was okay. "What happened?" Pete asked, still in a daze.
   "It were friskin spectacular."
   "Just about every bit of me aches. How come I'm on the outside of the pen now?"
   "You ran at the fence to make a hole, friskin bloody fast too. I never saw a penguin that fast for certain."
   "Then what happened?"
   "A fair bit! First you bounced off the wire mesh and got launched backwards, then you hit the other fence and flew back this way, caught the top and rolled right across the lawn."
   "But it didn't break the fence," Plain Pete complained.
   "Its weakened, look, stretches all round here. A good hack with some sharpened fish might break that."

*****

   "There's Charlotte, give her some bananas. Alphonse can't be far away with her unfortunate fixation on him."
   Charlotte greedily grabbed the bunch and sat down to eat them quickly, so no other animal had a chance of stealing any. Keeper and Owner looked around. There was a tearing noise as vegetation was pulled up. "Ah there's the big fella."
   More bananas in Keeper's hands and a whole Red Rocket* plant in Jungleman's armoured hand tempted Alphonse. "Come on boy, more of this back home, eh."
   To Owner's surprise and satisfaction, Alphonse duly followed all the way back to his own walled garden.
* (See book 2; Froxmap. It isn't the salady stuff.)

*****

   The phone squeaked. Hypnotic music played for a while. "Have you found the elephant?"
   "I am looking for the elephant, I will calm him with music, I will call you."

*****

   "You know what," said Plain Pete, "I reckon if I could go even faster, I could break that fence."
   "Well then bruvver, we need to work out some mechanism," Prefect Perseus replied. "Now who do we know with the brains to do that."
   "Not friskin Orlando, that capitalist-elitist hairy pig-dog, please," Poncho moaned.
   "He won't have anything to do with us, 'cept Penny of course."
   "Penny's too soft, I doubt she'll see the need."
   "Orlando? Who's Orlando?" Pete asked.
   "Friskin mutant elitist brain-box aardvark."
   "Let me try," Pete suggested, "I think I might have met him already."

*****

   "Have you seen the size of this petition?" Owner said in surprise. "Must be half of Cheshire signed up against the windfarm. Is it Nimbyism or do you think it's the SSSI thing."
   Sylvia Marketing saw the screen. "Woo, I wish we could get that response from the Zoo Friends."
   "I suspect this is a mixed blessing. I mean, we may not have to put up with a wind farm and damage to our ecosystem, but we'd lose potential rent earnings."
   "How about making up the difference with merchandising on the back of this petition?"
   "What merchandising? We can't use toy meerkats, they're already bagged."
   "We do have our own species of penguin."
   There was a sharp intake of breath and a look which could have been fear, or surprise at a brilliant idea, or both.

*****

Next: Wheels on fire, Monantos update elephant towing idea.

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